I am g u i l t y. I am guilty of being one of those women that when I am in a relationship, I put my all into said relationship. Now, that's not to say that It's a bad thing. I can be the most amazing girlfriend in the entire planet. I will put my partner first, and my relationship as my top priority. The downside is, that I may give too much. So much so, that sometimes I put my wants and needs on the back burner. Well, being single for a while now has made me realize many things. Below are 10 things us as women learn, when we are single.
1. Value of Relationships. In a new relationship, you want to be with that new person 24/7. That's understandable, but don't let your friendships fall by the wayside. I can't tell you how many times I've had my heartbroken and my girls and family, are always there for me. No matter how many relationships you have in your life, those closest to you will always stick around, and have your back. That saying, bros before hoe's can also be for the ladies. Guys come and go but your friends and family are forever!
2. Solitude. I've learned that I like being alone. I can relax, be by myself, and be happy in my own company. I use to believe I was afraid to be alone, but now I know that being alone does not mean that I am lonely.
3. Independence. I've taken control of my own life and I don't need others to attain any of my goals. Studies have proven that the more of an independent woman you are, the happier and stronger you feel. You can do whatever you want, whenever you want without worrying about what others think. You learn that you don't need a man to do anything. Besides, I can most likely do anything better and faster than if I ask a man to do it.
4. Settling Sucks. There is a Cuban saying "Mejor Sola Que Mal Acompañada". It means better off alone than in bad company. You will learn that you should never settle for less than what you deserve. You deserve the world and to be treated with the same love you are willing to give. Love is not a business contract. You need just as much passion as you do friendship and visa versa in the relationship. You need to find a balance. If you settle, there may be a day in your future where you feel as if you are missing something. Remember, in the end you're stuck with each other. I would much rather wait for that true once in a lifetime love, then be in a relationship with someone that just makes me feel average.
5. Fall In Love With Yourself Again. Many of us spend most of our lives looking for a partner to love. We're doing it all wrong. How can you find someone to love when you don't love you personally? Falling in love with oneself in a non selfish way, makes you more aware of your life. It helps you understand your worth and potential. If there is something you don't enjoy about yourself, fix it or change it. Once you love yourself, the love that you can give to others is limitless.
6. Ignore your past. When you are single you learn to ignore the past and focus on the future. What happened previous can not be changed. You can however, change what will happen in your future. Your past is a very precious experience. Without it, you would not be the strong woman you are today. Learn to let the past go, and look forward to all that is to come.
7. Be Selfish. You learn that being selfish is means two completely different things. The good kind of selfish helps you take control of your emotional, personal and physical needs. You need to start worrying about you first and others later. Being a little selfish can make the world around you better. Taking care of yourself first has been proven to make you healthier, happier, and more established.
8. Masturbation comes easy. Girl, on a less serious note. You finally have some time to yourself to learn what you like and what you don't. You have time to practice (;
9. Confidence. When single, you learn to be confident. Lack of self confidence, may and will bring you so many problems in your life and possibly in future relationships. When you're confident, you never take anything personally. You feel as if your life has purpose. You're insecurities become minuscule and you exude happiness.
10. Discover who you are. Knowing who you are as a woman is the most wonderful feeling. It's everything on this list and more rolled into one. You have confidence, you are independent. You are happy. You discover what makes you, well you and the purpose for your life. You understand what you want out of life and what you believe in. I read somewhere that it is a moment of spiritual awakening. I am not fully there just yet. Discovering who your true self is may take a while. We as women are constantly changing, but just know that once you get there, life and everything else is just heavenly.
Not being in a relationship has taught me so much about myself. I am constantly learning and changing. I've learned that life goes on and bigger and better things are coming my way. Just know that I am happy and I can not wait to see what the future has in store for me.